I’m posting below what I said to a participant in one of my workshops last year, because it has something important to say about what is happening in the USA this past couple of weeks – the horrific shooting of the children in Newtown, and the bizarre responses of some members of Congress who – blatantly or discreetly – still oppose the banning of weapons and ammunition whose only purpose is to kill people. Something is rotten in the United States when half of its political leaders have any reservations at all about a complete ban on assault weapons. I find it hard to imagine how they can live with themselves. Then the obvious jumps out at me: THEY DON’T LIVE WITH THEMSELVES. They can keep up their opposition precisely because they are disconnected from their hearts and souls. They are not in touch with themselves. They have lost the connection with their own humanity that sees that it matters – and matters more than all the ifs and buts – to eradicate without delay these weapons from all of civilian society in the USA. It is a no-brainer that this process begins with a total legal ban on the possession and sale of such weapons and the ammunition that goes with them. No compromise, no procrastinating, no watering down, no loop-holes, and never mind the difficulties, because the difficulties of eradication are nothing compared to the tragedies inflicted on innocent people by this crass and callous gun-cult. What matters is having the INTENTION. If you are heart-and-soul-connected with yourself, you care about other people’s hearts and souls. This is where the intention comes from and it cannot be subverted. It is not subject to manipulation by corporate lobbies, by money or political conniving and power-mongering. It is the rational and heartfelt position of anybody who is fully in touch with their whole being. And if, by the way, they are not, then what right could they possibly have to be governing other people?
So here is what I said to one of my workshop participants about caring:
“I realized many years ago when I was going through my own healing and therapy, that by the time I came out of the orphanage where I spent five years of my childhood, what I had learned to do in order to survive was to not care. My general attitude was, ‘So what, I don’t care! I don’t care what I do. I don’t care what they do. I don’t care what happens.’
“What it meant was that my heart was totally closed. That was how I learned to survive the unkind and sometimes cruel ways I was treated as a child. Of course, like everybody, my healing happened as I reconciled with all the feelings that I was afraid to feel and from which “I don’t care” saved me. As I learned how to be friendly again with my feelings – especially the tender and vulnerable ones that were the scariest to allow – my heart gradually opened again. With that opening came eventually the realization, Oh my God, I do care! That was almost four decades ago, and through all these years I have only come to care more. That is what I see happening for you. You found the courage to feel again and it is opening you to your real being. The more of your inner being that you befriend – and what you are afraid to feel is always the key – the more you care!
“And let me add, for all of you here, that, learning to care you become not only happier, but sadder too! Almost every time I read or listen to the news I am saddened, because most of the news is about people not caring. The crimes, the wars, the abuse – it’s like an endless procession of stories that can only be as dark as they are because of people who don’t care. And saddest of all is that so many people in positions of power don’t care, not with their hearts and souls. It seems as though in the corporate and political worlds most of those who climb high sell their souls to do so. When you sell your soul, how can you care? The most transforming thing that could happen to our human world and to this suffering planet is that people who aspire to positions of power and leadership have no chance if they are not fully connected with themselves – with their hearts and souls. That is a far cry from the way it is. What a pity!”
December 21, 2012