Alan talking to a couple during a Love and the Shadow workshop.
This is the miracle of The Art of Being circle. Here you are, cradled in your man’s arms while I’m working with you. My focus is with you, with the pain and the tears that I see in you. And then suddenly, totally unexpectedly, your man who’s holding you begins sobbing like a child. It’s magical! It’s not programmed. For me this is The Art of Being. This is how healing happens. Our deeper reality takes us by surprise because we don’t have our normal defenses and controls in place.
You tried to put up your defences too. You wanted to close down. You wanted not to see him so vulnerable. But you heard me when I asked you to breathe and tune in with him. You kept being here! You stayed open and let yourself feel all that he was touching in you, and in some mysterious way it was exactly what you needed so that your healing could begin happening.
Now suddenly it is much easier to go into it all. It’s not like a horror story anymore. And the beautiful thing is that it’s for you both. It’s amazing what happens in relationship. Whatever the wound is in you touches the wound that’s in him, and vice versa. It’s always so! When you don’t know how to deal with this, you keep hurting each other. What’s happening now is like finding hidden treasure in the shadow side of your relationship. As you heal, he heals. As he heals, you heal. Viva the miracles!